"Thanks for the Cool Stuff BITCHES!"

To get to the 3rd floor here in my office building, you must swipe your ID Badge in the appropriate spot in the elevator and if you pass the test, you are able to push the button to get to this floor. If your badge does not grant you access, you can do any number of things to gain access. For example, you can get on the elevator when someone else is coming up.. You can ask the lobby front desk person to “swipe you up”. You can obtain a “Visitors” badge or you can simply call Shari @ 49247 and she’ll come save you! I’ve used the last option on several occasions! My point here is that yes, technically, our floor is a “secure” floor, but security is pretty non existent if you ask me..

This leads me to the reason I am blogging today. I was in our break room this morning and noticed this sign…




My first, second and third reaction to this sign was hysterical laughter! …….. “our own “SECURED” floor.” REALLY? Secured? AHAHAHAHHAHA! Oh, sorry.. I just broke out in laughter again.. My favorite line is, “We assume we can use this space and feel that our belongings are safe, but now we’re victims of thief!” I’m thinking maybe in addition to the posters Campbell’s Soup bowl, the thief also stole their grammar checker! “we’re now victims of thief”… Of a thief.. or thieves maybe. Don’t get me wrong, I do not condone anyone taking someone else’s dinnerware, but it is a public room that several hundred staff and visitors use. You shouldn’t leave your precious items in there if you want to keep them forever and ever. The odds are not in your favor!

I could go to Goodwill and purchase a few of the items listed and randomly place them on my co-workers desks.. Now that would be FUNNY! And lastly, the note at the bottom encourages anyone who was a victim to add their missing items to the list. A co-worker said, “I should add my youth.. I’m sure I left it next to the soup bowl.” BAHA!

…. Mad props go out to Jeff! He inspired the title of this blog! YAY!